Never Again

He's walking away from me.
His back is tense, and I know he's angry with me.
I suppose he's got a right to be angry.
He's looking back at me now with that look in his eyes.
The look that says I've disappointed him again.
I know I'm a coward for not even trying.
He's been waiting twenty years,
and I can't even try.

He's getting in his truck,
Heading back to that empty place he calls home.
Soon I'll have to go back to my own empty life,
and wait for the next time we can see each other again.
It's not so different from what we've done for the last two decades.
Except, I have this awful feeling that something's going to happen.
This feeling is so over powering,
making it hard to breathe.

Every second takes him
further and further away from me.
I want to go after him.
I want to beg him to stay
and never leave my side.
Why couldn't I just tell him what he wanted to hear?
Why couldn't I just tell him I love him?

Instead, I say nothing.
I do nothing.
I just stand and watch him disappear,
not having the courage to call him back.

A tear runs down my cheek.
Somehow, I know,
deep in my soul,
I will never
See him again.